When are you ready to take your relationship up to the next level?

By Laura James

www.engagedmarriage.com

Many people dream of getting married to “the one,” but how do you know when you and your partner are ready to take the plunge?

Here are some questions to ask yourself if you're thinking of making plans to step the relationship up to the next level:

• Trust: Do you know each other's email and Facebook passwords but never feel the urge to use them to snoop? That's trust.
  Can you happily wave your partner goodbye as they go for a coffee with a friend of the same sex? That's trust.
  Would you tell them your deepest secrets? That's trust, too.
  It's an essential ingredient to a happy, healthy relationship. Make sure you've got that down pat before thinking about getting married.
• Goals: if your ultimate goal is to be a Hollywood movie star and your partner's is to live a quiet life in the country, this could become a source of conflict: You will be focusing energy on different goals.
  Aiming for the same objectives in life brings you closer together and also makes you more likely to achieve them because you're encouraging each other and working together to get there. Those who have met through a dating site like www.eharmony.com have a good basis for shared goals since they will have been matched on compatibility.
• Respect: This is another crucial ingredient in a marriage ready relationship.
  You won't be able to happily share your life with someone who you don't respect, or who doesn't respect you. This includes their opinions and perspective on life, their beliefs, values and intelligence. Signs of mutual respect include listening to the other's opinions, taking him/her and his/her ideas seriously and responding in kind.
• Love: This one goes without saying, but if you don't have a deep love for your prospective spouse then don't even consider getting married.
  Don't take them for granted – show your love in some small way every day, whether it's by spending quality time, being physically affectionate, giving words of encouragement and praise, or helping them out in some small way.
• Communication: We all know that talking about your problems is better than bottling them up, but this is easier said than done. Many people feel it's easier to ignore a problem than to bring it up. But if you ignore it, there's no chance of it being resolved.
  Communication is one of the key foundations of a strong relationship, and without it, marriages flounder.
• Expectations: How do you want to spend your days? Are you homebodies or party animals? Do you want to travel or live abroad?
  How will you distribute the household chores? Are you dog people or cat people?
  It's important to have these discussions before tying the knot.